Autobiography

No assignment could possibly be worse than these.

It's been years since a class has wanted me to write an autobiography paper, and I had hoped that I had seen the last of them in middle school. Everything about them just depresses me. I struggle immensely with even writing a paragraph or two about myself for online profiles, but a paper that is a minimum of three pages may kill me.

I'm actually in the class right now, which is pretty much a joke. Information Technology Seminar has little to do with either information or technology. It's pretty much just a careers class which is forcing me to look ahead in my life, which I hate doing.

Even just sitting here in class brainstorming for this paper has wreaked havoc on my good mood. Some of these guidelines are absolutely horrible.

• Discuss early observations regarding life.
• Include early influences. (People)
  
• How your early interests developed.
• Touch on outstanding accomplishments.
• How you ended up where you are.
• Current goals and future plans.

These are just some of the worst ones. It's not just that my early observations were all pretty negative, or that what mainly influenced me was computers, not people. Maybe I could talk about how my lack of people influenced me? I mean my parents have had to work 65+ hours a week each for my entire life, so I certainly didn't get my traits from them. I am so vastly different from everyone else in my family, which leaves the answer for what influenced my interests and hobbies as a question.

No one has interested me in books, computers, video games or anything else, I just remember being pulled into them ever since I can remember. Why didn't I end up liking other things? I have absolutely no idea how I ended up being who I am.

Outstanding accomplishments? That'll be a short section, unless of course I can just list off all the philosophy, political, and sociological books I have read. That really isn't an accomplishment though. I haven't won anything, gotten any trophies, or really lived.

I mean I'm not even an entirely negative person anymore, I have more good moods than bad I suppose, but even my earliest observations of life were pretty strange. Humanity is strange, a super-animal that lives in super-packs and builds super-zoos to live in. I mean we basically cling on to our animal instincts as much as possible, and it's always been easy to tell. We still have leaders to our tribes, we play sports to ease our hunter instincts, and also like the animal, the more packed into zoos (cities) we are, the more aggressive we become. The thing is, I see this as life, it is this way and it's not a bad thing, but even while you read it you were probably thinking of how cynical I am.

Between all of this, and the fact that I really don't remember much else of how I became who I am today, I'm almost positive I will fail this paper. It's either that or I'll lie like I always have on these. I just don't know what to say, don't know why I am this person, don't know why I'm not normal.

I hate autobiographies.

-That One Person